Another Nepali Wedding

I've just come back form the shortest visit I've ever taken to Nepal. All the times I have stayed in Nepal, I've lived at my friend Bidur's house in Lalitpur, to the south of the Kathmandu Valley. The youngest daughter in the family was getting married to an officer in the Nepali Army. As she was by all effects my own sister, I went to the wedding.

I found a cheap ticket via Delhi, a  route I was loathe to take as last time I did it meant sitting outside Delhi airport for 8 hours until I could check in for my flight. However, I was assured that there was now an all new transit terminal and I could just transit as I would through the Gulf. At Heathrow, I became rather excited as we pulled in as I could see the Qantas A380 sitting on the tarmac. When I had checked in and went through to departures there were a further 2 - Emirates and Singapore - sat there too. I was so excited I phoned my Dad. And Hannah. And my friends. (There is a reason for the total geekyness, I used to work on the A380 stress calcs when I was in Atkins.)

Being an airplane geek…

The flight to Kathmandu was nothing spectacular, Delhi airport was how it was promised with a clean and rather pleasant terminal. But the approach into Kathmandu is never normal. On our descent into Kathmandu the Himalaya poked up through the clouds, like stone icebergs floating in the sky, beautiful but deadly. I had so often flown into Kathmandu, but it had always been cloudy, this was the first time I had seen the mountains and I have to say I was lost for words.

The Himalaya on the approach to Kathmandu (can you tell the mountains from the clouds?)

When I arrived at the house, preparations for the wedding were well under way. All the furniture and electrical goods had been bought, they had been shopping to buy clothes for the new in-laws, family were arriving from the southern Terai plains and food was being prepared. Saru was there with her son, whom I had christened Bob. He had grown a lot since I had seen him last...

Bob - 1 year ago

Bob - this year...

I met an old Atkins colleague of mine, Saz, in Boudhanath, near where he was working. He had been in Nepal for 3 months or so, and was now moving on to Thailand. It was interesting to hear his impression of Nepal, the good bits and not so good.

The day before the wedding, I went to the groom's house with Achut, the Priest, a neighbour carrying some trays with gifts for the family. The taxi wound its way to the bride's new house, through fields and up hills. We arrived and gave the trays over to the groom's family before being fed and returning back home. In the afternoon, we went to the party palace where the wedding would take place to build the little temple, around which tomorrow's ceremony would be based.

Building the little temple - leaves, leaves and more leaves…

The day of passed in a bit of a blur, there were many different little ceremonies involving just the groom, just the bride and the couple together. I was very humbled to be able to take part, washing their feet at one point and attempting to carry the groom - which I failed at, so just walked with. I think the story is best told in photos, so here are a selection. I'm afraid i can't really expand on the meaning or reason behind any of the different parts of the puja but I'm there are guides that can explain it such as here.

Rachhu before the wedding, dressed in her red sari.

After moving to the wedding venue, the groom's party appears with trays covered in food, clothes, fruit and spices.

The groom arrived in a horse and carriage, as he was an Nepal Army Officer.

The bride and groom together

The groom's first puja ceremony

The beginning of the washing of the feet.

My turn to wash the bride and groom's feet. As part of this, wash the palms of the hand, top of the feet and then splash water over your head that has been dripped over their feet before drinking a little of the water as well. Then the tika is added to on the foreheads, whilst saying a prayer for the couple.

A puja for the whole of the bride's family with a shell.

Time to eat - there was lots of food laid on, Bibek managed to eat 7 ice creams…

After eating the bride and groom sit for some more puja, this time at the little temple we made the previous day.

The bride throws rice on to the fire, leading her husband around the little temple.

More puja sat down

Adding of the sindur powder

More puja sat down - note they have now changed positions though…

A game, where the younger relatives, normally girls, of the bride hide the groom's shoes to get money from him…

Achut carrying his sister around the little temple and the horse and carriage. I was supposed to carry the groom but failed - my excuse was that he was a little too short and I had to bend down a long way. Don't believe me? Damnation…

Leaving in the horse and carriage.

I returned to the UK a couple of days later, with a slightly poorly stomach but the knowledge that I'd be back back again soon. 

A bit of a strange thing happened on my way home though. Transiting through Delhi again, I went to the toilet. The man in the cubicle next to me was using a lot of water from the little tap next to the toilet, meant for washing yourself after doing your business. The floor in my cubicle was getting very wet. I realised that he was taking a shower there, as I looked down at the floor one time the reflection of a naked Indian man greeted me. I didn't look down again, needless to say. This was confirmed when a bar of soap shot into my cubicle quickly followed by a soapy had to retrieve it. I was a bit unsure whether to laugh or to feel violated. Maybe a suggestion for Indra Gandhi Airport - install some showers in the departures!

SAM